November 4, 2013; It has been 6 years since my Sonshine left the Earth. Try as I might, I just cannot think of 11/4 as just another day; without fail I am filled with pain and darkness.
As time has moved along, I have once again been able to find joy in other days that Jeremy, Nicki and I celebrated so happily together: Mother's Day, our birthdays, Christmas, Easter, etc. I can even smile on Jeremy's birthday and wish him a Happy Heavenly Birthday and although the pain is deep, there are wonderful memories to hold me together. But not this day. Not November 4th.
If I've written it once, I've written it a thousand times. No parent should ever know their childs death day. There is no greater tragedy than a parent outliving their child and I will maintain that thought and feeling for as long as I live.
I think my Son would be proud of me for picking myself up and forging on in life without him. For 26 years he was 1/2 of the light in my life and for the past 6, I have learned how to live with that 1/2 gone.
I love and miss my Sonshine - To the Moon and Back and Back Again. Forever.
Our favorite vacation spot was always Disneyland.
Jeremy, Nicki and I made some wonderful memories in Disneyland together. Nicki and I continue to go when we can and although bittersweet without Jeremy, his spirit is with us when we're there.